A group of Muslim women in southern Thailand are protesting a doctor for advertising online marriage services to help local Muslim men find up to three more wives.
Women claim that such polygamous pairing violates the example of the Qur'an. Dr. Waemahadi Wae-dao, a physician and former parliamentarian from the Muslim-majority southern border region, rejects criticism of his paid matchmaking services.
He claims to have good intentions and to help match men and wives according to the Islamic philosophy which allows Muslim men to have up to four wives.
The plan was to eliminate secret extramarital affairs and help both sides find suitable Muslim partners in southern Thailand. In some areas of the deep south of Thailand, women mostly live in poor and rebel-ridden areas on the border with Malaysia.
For each successful match, he charges the men 12,000 baht (about $ 315 USD). "This has led to a number of online criticisms, both polite and unpleasant." But I really don't care. "I find them ridiculous," she told BenarNews. Imams, or Muslim teachers, are required to perform such marriages, as according to Islamic law a man can marry up to 4 women as long as he can support.
Dr. Wae's practices are obsolete in today's world, according to Anchana Heemina, president of the Thai NGO Duay Jai (With Heart). "It is considering religious considerations as well as the needs of those who wish to marry more than one person."
"However, she overlooks the reasons why four women could marry in the past compared to the reality of these concepts in the current situation," she says.
Muslim men who marry for the sake of lust
Wae's matchmaking service, according to Anchana, requires women to describe their status, education, attractiveness, height and weight "as if they were competing in a competition that men can choose from."
She and five other women interviewed by BenarNews in the Deep South said they were against men marrying four wives, noting that the main reason for many men is that the Prophet Muhammad allowed it.
Habsoh, a 17-year-old single woman from Pattani province, said social media, especially Dr. Wae's personal Facebook posts, is drawing attention to something that's been buried for years.
"Muslim men seek lust instead of following the good example of the Prophet." The Prophet's method is flawless. he said.
"These men foolishly choose to have four wives on the pretext that Islamic law allows it, even if they are not responsible for any of their wives or children."
"They don't provide adequate financial support, they don't even give the same time and love," she said, saying that some men with many wives "force their wives to work to support them."
He has stated that there have been numerous events like this in his community of him. "The woman with a late pregnancy has to work on the rubber plantation and raise small children while the father of the family lives without worries," Habsoh explained.
The Doctor's Multi-Step Love Program
Dr. Wae, who previously represented a constituency in Narathiwat province, said he began marketing his "matchmaking business" this year after the COVID-19 outbreak subsided.
He said he observed people trying to find a partner as they worked as a doctor, politician, businessman and social worker in many parts of the country, so he decided to find a remedy for lonely hearts. He said he had received inquiries from nearly 1,700 people. Many of his clients are men looking for their first wife, but around 170 of them are looking for other wives. “One, according to Islam, men and women cannot live together without marriage; two, there is a significant number of single women between the ages of 27 and 35; and three, the men had a hard time finding beautiful women to marry, "Dr. Wae explained.
He claimed to have devised a multi-step plan that includes finding a couple with "matching alchemy" and introducing them to each other; organize a video call between the two in the presence of the staff; schedule a meeting with the couple and a partner; make a formal marriage proposal and arrange the wedding. "Some problems they have run into are that there are more women than men, and sometimes women are not comfortable with polygamy," explained Dr. Wae. "The dispute arises from misunderstandings and negative experiences with reckless, negligent and unjust men".
When reporters spoke to the matchmaker earlier this month, two Muslim wedding ceremonies were planned for the couples he had matched for the next few weeks. Both boyfriends are already married.
Abdul, a native of Yala province who asked that his surname not be used, said he had two wives but that his affection for each of him was not the same. “My solution is to keep the two separate. "If that happens, a war will break out," Abdul said. He admitted that it is not always possible for a man to provide fair and equitable provision for all his wives. "There can never be the same affection for both of us," Abdul explained, "but I want to be with both of them."
"I know the first wife is crying, but he has to agree because the Muslim religion allows it." He has to accept it, he said.
Thai Muslim Islamic leaders limit the age of marriage
Thailand's Islamic Governing Council enacted new legislation in 2018 that requires religious committee approval for marriages involving children under the age of 17. The lawsuit followed a backlash earlier this year on an 11-year-old Thai girl who married a 41-year-old Malaysian man, prompting both nations to demand stricter legislation against child marriages. The girl was reportedly repatriated to Thailand from Malaysia and placed in the custody of Thai social assistance staff. In Thailand, Muslim children of any age could first marry with parental permission, but now even young people under the age of 17 must seek approval from an Islamic committee, which will determine whether marriage is appropriate.
Wisut said the policy went into effect on December 4, 2018, after Sheikhul Islam, Thailand's top Muslim leader, signed his consent. According to human rights activist Angkhana Neelaphaijit, the regulation has no force of law and does not provide for sanctions for those who violate it.
For family and hereditary matters, Muslims in Thailand's four southernmost provinces follow Islamic law. However, there is no minimum age for marriage. In the Buddhist-majority country, three of the four provinces have a Muslim majority, while the fourth has a sizeable Muslim community. Thai law, which applies across the country, sets the minimum legal age for marriage at 17, although courts may allow young people to marry if there is a good reason. However, the reasons are not specified by law. According to Angkhana, the new movement of Thai Islamic leaders is a start on the right path, but more work is needed to preserve people's rights.
"It is good that the Sheikhul Islam Office has introduced this policy, but we should also try to reach an agreement with religious leaders on what we can do to punish offenders," she said. Angkhana further said that as Thailand's four southern provinces apply Muslim Islamic law for family matters, a loophole has allowed a boom in Malaysian men to travel to southern Thailand for a second or third marriage, due to the lack of control over what they face at home. .
"The problem is that in Malaysia, if a Muslim wants a second or third wife, he has to seek court approval." But there is no such regulation in Thailand and no one checks whether a man is rich enough to support a family, "she explained.